Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t buy bullshit

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I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

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I can count

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

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If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

What are the signs that a guy wants to marry you but is afraid of commitment or does not want to get married at all?

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I understand how hurricane paths work

I actually pay taxes

Is it possible to permanently quit pornography?

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

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I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

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I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I have been married for 34 years, and I found out my wife lied, and cheated a lot back before we got married. Does she not change, or is it possible she is still a cheater?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

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It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

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I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

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I don’t watch or listen to advertising

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

How do you handle family members who ask for handouts?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I can read

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I have a reading level above third grade

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I see through liars

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes